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Mind Yo’ Bizzness


By Chris Carr

Copyright May, 2003


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So, I was on this side of town with nice houses and trimmed lawns, ‘bout two or three days before Thanksgiving. I was pretty happy because, I was getting a check that week for my last two weeks work and it was going to be sweet.

It was cold enough to freeze ice cream out there, so I had my gloves on, trying to keep my hands warm. I was trying to get to this box, way the fuck in back of the truck and I had to move a bunch of other boxes. Before I knew it, a box slipped through my hands, falling off the truck with a loud crunch on the hard pavement.

Yo, I looked at that box and saw my whole Christmas, wrapped up in that one neat, mess. Jumped down out the truck, trying to see if maybe it was ok but it didn’t look good. I looked up and noticed this punk walking by, his nose all up in my business and I gave him a "get the fuck up outta my bizness," look ‘cause I was really swoll. I picked the box up, still hoping shit wasn’t as bad as it looked, but then I heard rattling. Shit!

Ol’ man Reynolds’ going to take this out my check, I thought, kicking a tire. I looked at the box, trying to see the fuck was in this mug anyway and saw the address. Then I looked up at the address on the house and had to kick the tires again. Got-damnit! This was the box I’d been looking for.

Home freeze was still looking at me, his head peeking around the corner of the building. I was ‘bout to give him the what for, when he says,

"That my microwave?"



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He pops around the corner with two bottles of some frou-frou looking beer and says, "Some Heinekens." Beer is beer, I figure and I downed that shit. He takes off his shoes and socks, lounging back on the couch like Cleopatra. Then he moves his foot toward my leg and brushes his toes against it, real soft. Nigga’s got blue toenails!

I’m getting a little buzz on, so I don’t give a fuck. Darrell’s running his foot up and down my leg and I totally forget about the rest of my deliveries. He gets up, walks around the coffee table and squats in front of me. I wasn’t even thinking ‘bout fucking so I was a little surprised when he opened my pants and my shit jumped out, all hard.

He gets all big eyed, looking at my shit and licks his lips. Just about nutted up when he swooped, swallowing all my fucking dick. This nigga was a pro. His mouth was like a moist, velvet vacuum cleaner, all sucked up around my shit, slurping and getting it all wet.

Went to moaning and pushing my dick up, looking at his fat juicy lips sliding up and down. Darrell’s slobbing on that shit, all the while working my pants down until they was at my knees. I’m thinking, fuck the microwave too. Hell, he getting something and I’m getting something and everybody’s happy.

Yo, I’ve had some niggas swing on my shit but homey had me comin’ ‘round the mountain in record time. Could feel it starting to come, then I looked up and that fucking cat was standing in the door, head cocked, its green eyes just looking at me. That’s when the front door flew open.

"The fuck!"



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